Divorcing with children makes any divorce more complex. Making sure your children have all they need at both parents' new homes is something both parents should take responsibility to ensure is in place.
For parents who are on the same page with their custody schedules, the most important thing to do is make sure their children have what they need at both homes. This may mean that for some items that are not feasible to travel back and forth, duplicates will be needed.
Distinguish between needs and wants
Divorce is expensive, so you may worry that providing your child everything he or she needs will be impossible and that it could make you look like a bad parent. The truth is that people understand this is a difficult time, and they only ask that your children have what they need to survive and thrive:
- Adequate food
- Adequate shelter
- Medical care
- Schooling
- Appropriate supervision
Is it always easy to get the nicest apartment or a new home after divorce? No. That doesn't mean you don't have what your child needs, though. For parents with a single child, having a separate bedroom or, at the very least, their own bed or sleeping space in the home is essential. You need to make sure your child has food to eat and that you're there to provide care for them.
Supporting your child
What should you do if you're worried about having what you need to support your child after divorce?
This is a legitimate concern. If you can, talk with your spouse about the concerns you have and why you feel that you may or may not have all you need to provide for your child. If you have an imminent need for funds to support yourself and your child, this could affect what is the best way to dived the marital estate.
Your divorce attorney can talk to you more directly about what to do if you're concerned about money. There are generally solutions to help people move forward and support their children appropriately.
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